Ese imibonano mpuzabitsina ni ngombwa kugirango abashyingiranwe babeho bishimye?

Ni kenshi abantu babana nk’umugore n’umugabo usanga bibaza iki kibazo nyamara ugasanga batakibonera igisubizo. Ese koko ni ngombwa? Niba ari ngombwa ni ukubera iki?

Benshi mu bashakanye bakunda kugirana amakimbirane ashingiye ku kutabasha gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina aho usanga umwe ayishaka undi atayishaka ahanini abagore ukaba usanga ari bo benshi baba batabishaka ndetse banibaza impamvu bagomba kuyikora.

Bamwe bati: "Umugabo wanjye ntanyitaho yewe ntanantegura neza[...] Ese ubundi kubera iki ari ngombwa gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina?[...] Ahari wenda mfite ikibazo...".

Ni ubwo bimeze gutya ariko imibonano mpuzabitsina ku bashakanye ni ingenzi cyane mu buzima bwabo ndetse no mu kugirango bagire urugo rwuzuye umunezero. Dore zimwe mu mpamvu:

Imibonano mpuzabitsina ni yo ituma abashakanye babana akaramata:

Ubundi imibonano mpuzabitsina ni cyo kintu cyonyine kihariye abashakanyea bashobora gusangira kandi batasangira n’undi muntu uwo ari we wese. Iki gikorwa kandi ni cyo cyonyine gitandukanya imibanire y’umugore n’umugabo n’abantu babiri bashobora kuba babana mu cyumba kimwe. Ni ishingiro ry’ubuzima bw’urugo rw’abashakanye.

Imibonano mpuzabitsina ku bashakanye ntibatandukanya n’abandi bantu bashobora kuba babana mu cyumba gusa ahubwo inatuma habaho uburyo bwo kumvikana(communication) bwimbitse utasanga hagati y’abandi bantu. Ibatoza kuganira kandi mukaganira ku bintu by’ibanga n’amarangamutima. Urugero kugirango umugore n’umugabo bagere ku munezero nyawo muri iki gikorwa ni ngombwa ko babwirana buri wese ahamunyura, uko yifuza ko yamukoraho, aho yamukora... Ibi ntiwabibwira uwo ari we wese.

Imibonano mpuzabitsina ituma habaho kugira inyota yo kumenyana ndetse guhuza ku buryo bwihariye:

Kugirango abantu bashobore kuganira nta mbereka, kwizerana ni byo bigira uruhare mu gutuma abashakanye babasha kwiyumvanamo ku buryo budasanzwe kandi ku buryo buri umwe atabigirira undi uwo ari we wese batarakorana iki gikorwa. Uku kugirana ibiganiro byimbitse kandi byo kwizerana ndetse no gukoranaho bituma habaho kugira inyota yo guharanira ko imibanire yabo yakomera. Ibi bituma abashakanye buri wese yumva mugenzi we amwitayeho kandi amutekerezaho cyane birenze uko incuti isanzwe itekereza ku ncuti yayo.

Mu by’ukuri rero ik’ingenzi ku bashakanye si incuro bakora imibonano mpuzabitsina mu cyumweru cyangwa mu kwezi ahubwo ik’ingenzi ni uko iki gikorwa cyahinduka umwanya wo kumenyana byimbitse ndetse no kubaka isano rikomeye hagati yabo. Ni umwanya wo kuganira ndetse no kwiyereka mugenzi wawe ntaho umukinze. Niba rero ibi bitagezweho abashakanye bazabaho batishimye.

Abashakanye bakwiye kwigira muri iki gikorwa uburyo bwo kuganira ku mibonano mpuzabitsina, kumenye buri wese igishimisha mugenzi we kurusha ibindi. Uru ni rwo rufunguzo rwo gukora imibonano ishimisha abashakanye ikaba n’ishingiro ryo kubaka urugo ruhamye kandi rwuzuye umunezero.

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